Breaking The Shackles

I haven't updated for awhile, as I'm sure you've noticed. I'm well aware of that fact, and don't need to be told otherwise. I don't update just for the sake of updating. I have a lot going on, and sometimes need time to put all my thoughts and feelings into words.

Things aren't going "well" for me. The head-hancho of the company (I refuse to call it a school), wants me fired, whereas the DOS (think General Manager/Manager) wants me to stay. I'm under a lot of pressure and I don't like it. They took 2 more classes away from me, due to complaints and parents saying they'd like their money back if they didn't get a different teacher. I simply don't think this is my thing anymore - maybe not EFL teaching anyways. I don't think I exhibit the correct type of personality to give these parents what they're expecting. I'm an anti-social, down-to-earth, serious, cold sort of person. Yea I'm a nice guy, but that's not what they want. They want someone who is fun, and energetic, motivating, and willing to do things that may make a fool of themselves. I'm convinced, although I've been told otherwise, that in this business entertainment is greater than education. They want the parents to think the kid is having a good time, they want the kid to tell the parents they are having a good time, and maybe, just maybe learn a little something to prove to mum and dad that they picked something up. Even if it's one word. Do I agree with this: NO!

Whenever I ask what the complaints against me are, I never get the full story - I just get a synopsis. They find class boring, they find class too easy, they don't think I discipline well enough. Well I've tried to make class more fun, by doing thigns other teachers do and I get told by the dos "I don't think you understand what we mean by fun." I tell them I'm simply going by the books as to what to do for class, it's not like I've DONE these classes before, it's new to me too. "Well, maybe you need to not use the book and incorporate your own stuff." Well genius, like I said maybe after I've taught the class once or twice I can do that, but not the first time. Then the discipline, that's just off the wall. I don't know what they're talking about. It's not like there are fist fights going on in class. I simply don't know anymore.

The question came up of if I'd be completing my contract or not, at the time when I was in the office I said I was about 80% sure I would... Now though, after I've had some time to think about what was said, and all of that, I don't want to be there anymore. This job has turned into the worst employment experience I've had yet. I felt better being laid off from RMH than this, and I was losing my job then!

Evidently, after speaking with some locals, people here in Wuhan at least consider a good teacher one that plays games with them. I don't get it... China is renowned for it's intelligent people, yet to me it seems like none of them want to learn anything... There is the ocasional exception, but the majority are falling into that classification. Who knows?

I'm sure I'll get some lengthy comments about just doing what you've got to do, work isn't fun, blah blah blah. Don't want to hear it, I'm telling you now. I should also point out that none of my co-workers and I really have anything in common. They want to drink/smoke/party, I don't want to. There is talk about me - I hear things. Doug tells me some things too, but he never goes into detail. He's got other things on his mind I'm sure.

So I guess people are going to wonder what I'm going to do. Will I be staying here, will I be going home? The answer to that question is unclear at the moment. I'm going to be speaking with some friends tomorrow seeking advice - and hopefully I'll have a plan then. If I do go home, I'll be going to school... Probably in Denton where Stoerm is working - if not there, maybe San Antonio, or San Marcus. Haven't fully decided yet. I've spoken w/ dad briefly about what was going on, and he said He'd understand if I went home, but hoped I could stay. I was glad to hear that.

Anyways, enough about work, sort of.

As you know we had the Halloween Party... I was in a bad mood the whole night, partially because it was my day off and I didn't want to go, and I had just gotten the news that I've talked about above the night before. I went to sleep real early that night and woke up at like 6am to Doug slamming doors and being extremly loud. I tried to go back to sleep and couldn't, so I got up and left. I ventured down the road near our place that has a lot of food outlets, street food that is. This is the first time I'd been here in the morning, I hate mornings! It was hoppin! I was hungry so I looked around and couldn't decide what to get. I was thinking about getting these peanut butter/sesame oil breakfast noodles that are good, but they're a little weird sometimes. I saw this guy frying something and watched for awhile. He had different types of things, so I was trying to figure out what they were, but was unable to do so. I decided to try one so I pointed at one showed 2 on my fingers and handed him a 5 - I got 4 back... First good sign! I then decided to buy a drink from the little convient store, and then I was like I don't want to go home, so I went to the internet cafe. It was dead! Like 10 people includding me maybe. So I paid, tried to use my card but it didn't work. I had to go back up to the lady at the counter and explain to her in broken english that it wasn't working. She eventually tried it and found out what I was trying to explain. I think this lady is a robot - she's here all hours of the day, everyday I've been here. I don't see her sleeping, I do see her eating sometimes. She also smiles and giggles at me, she probably likes me lol. Anyways I got that sorted out so it was time to try the whatever it is I bought. I took a bite and noticed that it was kind of like funnel cake batter. Crispy on the outside, soft in the middle, but real thin. There was a buldge at the bottom, and the whole thing was omlet shaped. I took a bite of the buldge and there were noodles inside! Anyways the whole thing was good, both of them and I'd get them again. I think I'll try one of the other kinds next time to see what they're like. I stayed at the cafe for 5 hours, this is where I talked to dad for a bit. Went back to the convient store and bought another drink and some chips then went home. I was getting out of the elevator on the 19th floor (our floor) and guess who's standing outside waiting to get on the elevator... That's right Doug is! He tells me a couple of the guys were going to KFC and wanted to know if I was going. I didn't feel like speaking so I just showed him the bag with the stuff I bought. He said he knew I bought the stuff but wanted to know if I would go. I walked to the door and put my stuff in there then went with them.

So we walked down to KFC, it's like a 5 mins walk if that - very close. No one was there, so that upset me more. We stood outside waiting for them, Doug ran off to take some pictures of motorcycles. I stood in one spot the whole time, looking at girls as they walked by. One of them eventually showed up so we went inside and ordered... Again I haven't spoken a word, not even to the order taker. Times passes, we get our food, eat it, Two people at the table of four are talking, two aren't. They decide to go to a DVD shop, and I decide to go home.

I get home and take a shower, and by the time I'm done Doug is already home and dressed for the party. He leaves and I continued to get ready. I wore my costume while walking to school and at one point a women looked behind her and sees me walking behind her as well. I guess she got scared because she started to walk faster, and eventually went into a full sprint (with heels mind you)... That was kind of nice feeling inside. I decided to walk the back way because there is some type of official building (government maybe) that we walk by if we go the regular way, and I didn't want any problems. I got lots of scared looks and security guards looking a little questionable about me walking. More time passes.

So I get to school and step out of the elevator, co-workers tell me they like it, keep in mind I still haven't spoken a word since I got up this morning, it's now approaching 4:00pm. Then... Then the chinese staff girl that I like sees me and starts smilling and say how very handsome I look... I had to speak then. We walk to the hotel where the party is - Doug walks w/ the Co-Workers... I walk w/ the chinese staff (girls) and philip a chinese english teacher. We setup do our thing and go home... I don't feel like explaining everything - Maybe Doug will, this post is already long enough.

After the party, they were going to get together to.... you guessed it, drink. I declined and went home, then came back to the internet cafe where I stayed for awhile and got into an argument over messenger w/ doug. I then went home and went to sleep.

Not much worth noting that happened today. Sat around the apartment, watched movies, slept late. Doug went out w/ that girl he met - said it went well - I'm sure he'll explain more. Then he left again to ... dun dun dun ... go to a bar, which I declined to do again.

So that's the story of my life: Work is bad, I don't go out w/ co-workers, and I sleep a lot.

Enjoy this picture of the easter bunny participating in halloween

Happy Halloween For All of you back home... Wish I could be there.

Oh and I want one of these: http://www.apple.com/macbookpro/ or even but those will be seeing an update before the end of the year I believe, so I'd rather wait on that. Yeah I know too much money, but I still want one.